We had a prophecy conference this past weekend at our church. Dr. David Larsen, who is our pastor’s friend and mentor, came and pontificated (so his word, not mine) on the rapture and the middle east and today’s moral freefall. (all of them different sessions)
I attended the moral freefall session and after he expounded, he opened it up for a Q and A. I had a question. But I couldn’t figure it out. But in front of hundreds of people, I still couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I had to ask.
My Question: What makes today’s moral dilemma any different from other periods in history?
What I said: I would really like my little ones to grow up in a decent society. But don’t you think that it’s better to grow up where evil is called evil instead of growing up where evil is hidden under moral decency?
At this point, he was just staring at me.
Okay, so I need to say more.
Me: “Like people aren’t going to church because they really don’t believe and they aren’t” blah blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda digging deeper and deeper into a hole. “Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”
Dr. Larsen: I hear what you are saying but I still haven’t heard a question.
Me: *sigh*” I’m going to get it out.” blah blah blah–somewhere in there a question finally emerged.
And he answered it–at least he answered what I asked even if that wasn’t not my intent. Basically he disagreed with me. And you want to know how he answered it? His illustration was the the different choices that we have between homeschool, private, and public school.
Really! That’s not what I asked. I’m pretty sure at least.
Yes, that has been going around in my head for months (as you can all attest to), but THAT’s not where I was going with this question.
I hate it when someone doesn’t agree with me.
Oh, it was so humiliating.
Then, I decided to talk to him after everything was all said and done, but I still couldn’t figure out how to make myself clear and so once again I humiliated myself.
I drove home in a mix of frustration and embarrassment. I think I turned red in the darkness of the van at least 5 times. I was so upset.
That night I couldn’t sleep because I was so bummed that I had been such an idiot.
I even prayed, “I know, Lord, that it’s good for me to be humbled. This is really hard. Please help me to learn whatever lesson I need to learn and make some good come out of this.”
Which probably really meant, “Please help me feel better about myself.”
That didn’t happen.
All the next morning, I held a party.
A pity party all for myself.
As Chris was getting ready to leave for work, I said, “When my pity party is over, I’ll let you know, but I don’t think it’s going to be for awhile UNLESS I GET SOME HELP!“
He finally asked me what my question was.
When I told him what I said, he kindly said, “Gianna, there really isn’t a question in what you have said. It’s an opinion.”
Me: Well, I guess what I wanted to ask him was what makes today different from other periods of history?
Chris: That’s a question. And that’s a good one. And don’t worry about it, he probably won’t ever remember you.
Me: What about the hundreds of other people?
Me: Are you trying to say that they all know me and they already know what a DORK I am?
Chris: *shrug* *grin*
Me; You are! You TOTALLY are!
Chris laughed in agreeance and I was finally able to laugh.
After he left for work, I called Dacia to moan over the fact that once again I was an idiot. She stated that nobody else probably even remembers what was said/asked.
Me: Yeah, you are probably right.
Me: Oh, NO! They recorded everything included the question and answer time! Everyone will hear me!
Dacia: So what you are saying is that this is going to be forever recorded in history.
Me: Yes. oh, yes.
I would like to say that I have learned my lesson.
But I know I haven’t.
Not really, anyway!
Can someone please wire my jaw shut?